Your Husbands Name – to Have and to Hold...Will You Change Your Name After Marriage?

What’s in a Surname?

While strong attachment to your first name is naturally assumed – and many continental countries celebrate an individual’s ‘Name Day’ as voraciously as they celebrate a birthday - your first name is used mostly by your friends and family whereas your surname serves a broader purpose.

Your title and surname declares who you are to the wider world, encapsulating part of your identity and how you choose to present yourself to those outside your immediate social circle. In many situations, the people you interact with in more formal situations may not even know your first name but address you by your surname.

For some women, changing their name feels a lot like losing touch with part of their identity. The phrase ‘Who Am I?’ becomes as pertinent a part of the marriage process as ‘I do’ and the decision of which name to use upon marriage becomes a difficult one.

Your Name After Marriage: A Link to the Past, Present and Future

One of the major factors that makes changing a name so emotional, is what the name connects you to.

Your original surname or maiden name provides a link to your family, your heritage, your career and life to date – undoubtedly difficult things to lose touch with. A lot of women take pride in their family history and have a strong desire to honour their birth family by keeping their surname after marriage.

The average age of a bride is also increasing – from 23 years old in 1981 to 30 years old less than a generation later in 2011 – which means you have a longer history and connection to your original family name by the time you walk down the aisle.

In practice, it also means that most brides have built a career reputation using their maiden name and don’t want to lose the kudos they have accumulated. Some may be inclined to continue using their maiden name at work for continuity but be known by their new name, Mrs X, on the weekend and in informal or social settings.

Meanwhile, the argument for the other side of the debate is equally as reasoned - your married name often represents a link to your future; your new family unit, the life you’ll create as a couple and ties to any potential future children.

Taking your spouse’s surname following marriage is a way to create a new family united by one surname, and many couples see it as their ‘team name’, especially if they plan to add mini-team members further down the line.

It can also be a link to tradition, the age-old practice of taking a new name following marriage, like wearing a wedding band bears a symbol of your commitment to one another to the outside world. For others who want to change their name, it’s simply seen as an exciting & natural thing to do – to have a new title, name and signature that ties together the new you.

Consider Name Change Alternatives

Increasingly, brides are coming to realise that it doesn’t have to be a matter of either/or.

The last decade has seen rise in the number of alternative approaches that offer a perfect compromise and can seem more in keeping with the balanced equality we expect in our marriages today.

Gone are the days that the double-barrelled surname is reserved for the posh polo playing lot – it has become more popular than you might think. It symbolises equality yet also respects tradition – favoured by those with have a deep-rooted heritage that they want to preserve, particularly if they represent the end of a family line.

An increasing trend amongst modern newlyweds is the creation of their very own new name by either fusing their two surnames (known as meshing or name blending) or choosing a new moniker that they identify with as a couple - effectively co-creating “Part Two” of their life story.

NameSwitch Pro Tip: To mesh surnames you will to change your surname by deed poll.  

For same-sex couples, where tradition has yet to dictate how things are ‘expected’ to be done, there are no societal norms to conform to. The vast array of aforementioned possibilities are open to being explored and considered.

While these name change options do require a little more planning as the change needs to be formalised by deed poll, rather than the marriage certificate, the ease of using a deed poll makes things quick and straightforward.

A record 85,000 Brits changed their name by deed poll in 2015, more than twice as many as a decade ago, demonstrating just how appealing and easy it is to create a legal name for yourself that fits you entirely.

Change Your Name: The Right Decision - for the Right Reasons

Ultimately, what your name connects you to is a personal perception and will be different for each individual. The reasons you might keep or change your name are as varied as brides themselves, and all are equally valid. At the end of the day, it’s a personal decision and one that you need to feel comfortable holding for the rest of your life, as the coming chapters unfold.

While a wedding might bring out the opinions of certain family members on everything from your choice of flowers to food, themes and table plans, be careful not to include them in your name change discussions until you and your partner are confident in your own decisions. Even the hint of deviation from tradition just might spur a reaction from the extended wedding party, so be careful not to share your thoughts too early and invite unwanted opinions. 

Whether you decide to change your name, make your maiden name as a middle name, double-barrel surnames, mesh two names into one, or continue to use your maiden name, the choice is only yours and your partner’s to make. 

Which brings us to the next topic. The one person you do need to include is your partner. It’s an important decision for both of you, so make sure you include them in your deliberations - pour a glass of wine or put the kettle on and settle down with your partner for a proper discussion at a time when both of you are relaxed, open to talking and not in a rush.

NameSwitch Can Help You Change Your Name After Marriage in the UK 

The decision to change your name after marriage (or not) is a monumental one, and undoubtedly one that should be very carefully considered.

Whether you choose to keep your maiden name, take your partner’s name, double-barrel both names or create a new surname altogether, the decision should be based on what feels right for you and not based on how you feel about paperwork - NameSwitch’s name change notification packages can help make that process super simple! 

NameSwitch was established ease the stress of legally changing your name in the UK, by making the process as simple and straightforward as possible - saving you hours of seemingly endless research, only to discover differing policies and processes, tedious letter writing and filling out confusing forms. We use smart, secure automation to help you change your name following marriage (or for any other reason) with ease and the security of knowing you’ll get it right the first time. Our award winning, simple 3 step process will get you on the road to using your new name in no time! 

Changing Your Name: Common Questions

Why do people change their name upon marriage?

People may wish to change their name to uphold tradition, or a desire to share a family name, cultural/religious practices, or simply their own personal preference. For some, it symbolises unity and commitment. For others, it’s simply what feels familiar or “right” to them personally.

Do you have to change your name in the UK after marriage?

No. In the UK changing your name following your marriage is completely up to each individual. A marriage certificate does not automatically change your legal name, and keeping your original surname has no effect on the legality of your marriage. There is no right or wrong way to go! 

Is it more common to change your name after marriage or use your maiden name? 

In the UK it is still very common for women to take their spouse’s surname, but it is becoming less universal. Some find keeping their maiden name to be the right choice, while many couples now choose to double-barrel surnames or use different names professionally and socially. 

Can a husband take his wife’s last name upon marriage in the UK?

Absolutely! More and more men are opting to assume their wife’s surname, take her surname aa middle name, mesh surnames or double-barrel surnames. In some cases, an original marriage certificate will serve as legal documentation to process a name change, but others you will need a deed poll.